Aye, bollox to this.

Lets read between the lines shall we?


Rugby Fan Cuts off Own Testicles

Welsh idiot will never breed (phew!)

A Welsh rugby fan cut off his own testicles after his team beat England, police confirmed today.

A mental welsh fool, hacks his bollocks off, sez the coppers.

The man was rushed to hospital after the incident at Leigh Social Club in Caerphilly, South Wales.

Why? Are they gonna sew them back on? Please, he's now eunuch, give him to the Prince of Wales as a present.

A Gwent Police spokeswoman said: We received a call from the ambulance service at approximately 9pm on the 5th to inform us of a situation at the Leigh Social Club in which a man had indeed severed his own testicles.

Ambulance: "haha, you're not going to believe this Gwyn, some idiot has cut his own balls off!"
Police: "I bet he's got big balls!" Guffaw, guffaw.
Ambulance: "No Dave, he's just a bit mental, or maybe off that show Dirty Sanchez.

She said the man was taken to Heath Hospital but could not confirm his condition.

Because all the doctors are laughing their heads off.

It was reported that the man told his friends: If Wales win I'll cut my own balls off.

Wouldn't it be a more logical thing to say that if maybe Wales lost he'd cut the plums?
But if they won? This guy does not deserve his balls, or his brain.

After the 11-9 victory in the Six Nations clash, the man is reported to have gone outside and severed his testicles before bringing them back into the club to show fellow drinkers.

With what? A pen knife, a tin lid? I'm dying to know. In the dark? Under a street light? Imagine the guy, chortling away to himself....."Let's see who's got the balls now eh?" In your hand, you fuckwit.

A local was reported as saying that the man was on medication and should not have been drinking.

Do they prescribe soapbar in Wales?

I propose that the doctor gets him a nice set of neuticles, maybe in the shape of rugby balls, y'know as a little momento.