Friday, October 14, 2005

Top tips.

Today I used my sure fire way of getting on the bus. And you know what, I'm going to share this top tip with you. As most of you may know, getting on a bus can be a crash course in urban warfare. Apart from elbowing people in the face, I have a more subliminal way of making sure I get on the bus. Honestly this works maybe 80% of the time.

Step 1: Just hang out, looking for your bus to come along the road.
Step 2: Spy your packed bus hurtling towards you.
Step 3: Quickly move to the curb
Step 4: This is the most important part!
Step 5: Make sure you get eye contact with the driver
Step 6: Flag down the bus
Step 7: Smugly get on the bus.

People look at me when I do this, and usually think, What an idiot, the bus is going to stop here, look at all the people that need to get on the bus. The thing is that, the bus driver sees your hand, and unconsciously will stop the bus where your hand is. Thus making me the first to get on the bus, with the hordes of minions behind me. So they should be as well. Try it, fair readers.

As you can tell from my inane babble above, not much has been going on round these parts lately. Well quite a lot has really, but I'm not too sure if I should even bother commiting it to here. It's just the usual really.

Benders of epic proportions, locking myself out of my house for days, somehow managing to get a busted nose from myself and a pal having a slapping competition, passing out, people drawing on me, a mate trying to turn me into Adam Ant with a bottle of tippex. And that was just one night. What a great bunch of mates I have eh?

All that and I'm insanely tired all the time. It must be the onset of winter. I'm positive I need to hibernate.